Today I ate lunch sitting at my dining room table by myself for the first time since I moved into this house over a year and-a-half ago (#15). I had been watching a movie when I realized I was hungry, and I didn't really want to eat while I watched it because I really wanted to be focused on the movie. So, looking at the freshly cleaned off table, I decided this would be a good day to start a new task. I wasn't much in a mood to cook and had initially thought I would just have a sandwich and chips, but then thought it would probably be a better idea to have some sort of vegetable. So after a quick glance through the freezer (the only fresh veggie I have at the moment is a bag of spinach which is intended for a big salad), I opted for Green Giant Steamers Garden Vegetable Medley (i.e. snap peas, red pepper, and potatoes in an herb sauce). That with a few strips of pre-cooked seasoned chicken breast from Trader Joe's, three slices of havarti cheese (okay, four really, because I ate one while I was waiting for the veggies to cook... I was hungry!), and a glass of water. Yes, these are the kinds of noncohesive meals I put together on a regular basis. I actually set a place at the table and decided not to turn on any music or have the TV on in the living room for background noise. Boy was it quiet! The loudest sound was the kitchen clock ticking away, but I could also hear birds chirping faintly from outside. My first impression was that I will probably never buy this vegetable mix again. The peas were slightly overcooked, the potatoes seemed slightly undercooked, and the red pepper was just limp. The sauce was nice, though, and I was pleasantly surprised that there wasn't so much that the vegetables were drowned in it. That's something that Green Giant tends to do well -- their sauces. The chicken was tasty as usual, although I hadn't warmed it up at all which was probably a mistake. The cheese was delicious, of course.
I found myself truly taking only one bite at a time, chewing it thoroughly, and not loading my fork until I had swallowed and was ready for another bite. I'm not a person who typically rushes through my meals, but today I felt particularly aware of my every movement. I noticed the room and realized all the things I need to do in there: rearrange the china cabinet, dust the chandelier, change the paint color, find another storage cabinet so I can unpack the rest of the dishes and not have bowls and candle holders sitting everywhere, etc. Partway through the meal I thought I wouldn't even finish all the food on my plate and that I would probably need to refill my water glass. It was interesting, though, that as I kept eating, I seemed to adjust those thoughts. The rate at which I was drinking slowed down so that by the end of the meal, I had exactly one swallow of water left. And I ended up cleaning my whole plate, although as I sat there for a moment after finishing, I realized that I did feel very full. The odd thing was that these things did not happen consciously at all even though I was very conscious of what I was doing on a bite-by-bite basis. I guess those are the kinds of things that become so ingrained over a lifetime, that you don't even notice them anymore.
I finished the vegetables first. And now I am going to reveal a secret that probably nobody knows. Whatever I like least on a plate, is almost always the thing that I will finish first. I have a feeling that Mashelda will likely be watching for this the next time we have a meal together! I do it so that food that I like least contaminates the rest of the meal as little as possible, which actually does make sense if you think about it. Of course, I suppose I could just not eat that food, but that's not always an option, or at least it isn't in my mind. I guess it could be argued both ways. But growing up, I was expected to eat everything (or at least most of everything) on my plate, so this was my way of getting past whatever thing my mom fixed that I didn't like. I think this backfired, though, because now my mother thinks there are lots of foods that I like but that I actually don't. I guess she took it as my eating it all up quickly because I liked it so much. Oops!
Anyway, this was a very interesting experiment, and I am curious to see what the rest of the week will be like. And who ever would have thought I would have so much to say about eating one meal? I can say that I think I will be doing more cooking and less fast food this week! It's hard to imagine being that aware of your every bite when you're eating something like McDonald's. I don't think I want to dwell that much on my double cheeseburger.
On a side note, last Friday (the 16th) was the first day in another pop-less month (#46). I had to finish up the last 12-pack of Pepsi (that I had gotten on a really good couponing deal) before I started this up again. I'm hoping it will be a little easier this time around, but we'll see...
oh my god, I just wrote a long post and it disappeared. I am now writing this in a word document. Sorry, I’m not sure that this one will be as long but I was saying that I was surprised that you don’t eat most of your meals at the table, I would have thought you would. You just seem like the type of person that would eat most of your meals at the dining room table. I’m not surprised that you would save the thing that you least want to eat for last, that seems to make sense. I tend to not eat something that I don’t want to eat or I mix it with the thing I like to make it better somehow. I like my last bite to be of my most favorite thing because that is the taste I want to linger in my mouth. I was luckier than you in the fact that I don’t remember being forced to eat things I don’t like. Actually my mother rarely cooked things that I don’t like and later in life as I teen, I did a lot of the cooking. Also she was always so critical about my weight that she would never think of forcing me to eat something even if it was healthy. I just don’t think we ever had things that I hate like brussel sprouts or asparagus. I didn’t have those growing up. The only thing she ever cooked that I didn’t like was liver and I think that was expensive enough that my parents considered that a treat just for them. I think they liked the fact that my brother and I didn’t like it. I honestly can’t think of anything else that we had that I didn’t like. There really aren’t many foods that I don’t like, just desserts. I am very picky about desserts.
ReplyDeleteYes, you are very lucky. The forced eating started from a very early age, and the first food I specifically remember it happening was with eggs. I think the fact that I had to eat them regularly despite hating them so much (including actually throwing up at the table once when I was maybe 5 or 6), increased my aversion to them that much more. I remember having to sit at the table for at least an hour one time because I wouldn't eat something. Gee, wonder why I have food issues? So I had that AND the mother who was critical of my weight (although not as directly as yours).
DeleteI'm not sure why I've rarely eaten at the table as an adult. Growing up, we didn't eat at the official dining room table except for special occasions, but we either at ate the breakfast room table or a card table that we would put up in the den specifically just for meals. We usually ate dinner in front of the TV at that card table, so maybe that's why.